I personally don't do it. Mainly because I am picky, so I don't have too many women that I message anyway. It doesn't do wonders for my reply rate, but I don't really care about that too much.
Why did you have to discover more gradually? Did he lie about this when you confronted him? - Yes, the day I found out, I phoned him at work in tears and told him I was unwell. He came straight home and found me in a state. He thought something was wrong pregnancy wise, but I told him I had had a text from a girl. He denied it to start with, but then when i said i would ring her to seek clarification, he said she was a friend who he had been chatting with - nothing more. However a day or so later I didn't think things added up, so I checked his phone bills again (more thoroughly) and realised that pictures were exchanged. I therefore sent a text to the number again saying 'remember the pictures we sent' and she replied saying 'oh yes, very well, and the way we described everything we would do to each other' etc etc..
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